WHAT??? A celibate man???
Celibacy. AAAAAHHHHHHH. The weakest part of my Christian walk. For years I dealt with this issue with no struggle at all. Not that I wasn’t fornicating, but it wasn’t a struggle because I just had no desire to even be celibate. There was no fight. It was never even on my mind to wait till marriage. I enjoyed it and I was going to continue to do so. I figured; I do so much for the kingdom, im teaching, preaching, mentoring etc etc. This one thing God should let me have. I mean im doing all the ministry He asked me to do; why cant I have my pleasure? Beside who am I hurting? Im being honest to the women about what I want and im not dealing with any church girls. Im only having sex with women who are already out there doing it. Sounds logical to me. Never even realized that sex had became an idol in my life. God wasn’t enough for me, I needed more.
So as ministry got more intense, and promises spoke over my life. It was like im doing so much and getting nowhere. God would clearly speak to me and tell me I had to stop having sex. I would clearly say back “naaah that aint gonna happen.” I understand that God knows your heart and thoughts, so it was no need to lie to Him. For about a year God would speak and say the same thing, and I would reply the same way. NO! (Painful to type this) I felt as if I deserved to have sex because of what I do for the kingdom. Meanwhile im still doing so much for the kingdom and getting nowhere.
After a year of God telling me what He wanted, my spirit began to get heavy. And my life began to crumble. Chasing sex I ended up with 2 DUI’s and had to go to jail for a weekend. Now what am I, the preacher the prophet of God doing in jail????? All because I didn’t want to give up sex. So as my spirit grew more and more heavy, I realized that God was not letting up on what He required, but He was letting up His hand from over me due to my disobedience. I knew what I had to do and just thinking about would have my stomach in knots. I talked to my friend Love Da Poet (who is proud of his celibacy) he told me “you cant look at sex as pleasure. You have to look at it as sin. And we’re supposed to hate sin how God hates sin.“ That really gave me a different outlook on it. I finally received the strength to give it up. I lied in my bed one morning and said (after about 100 deep breaths) Lord im taking the vow. Im giving up sex and im going to be celibate.
After I said it I felt a weight lift off of my body and heard God say “Now that you have given your all to me, watch what I do.” From that day forward, door just began to open. I began to meet all the right people and ministry became more impact full. I now see that it wasn’t really about the sex, it was about giving my all to God to receive His all from Him. I have to be honest it wasn’t easy in the beginning and I did slip up once. Not that its acceptable, but im proud to have only slipped one time in a year. Giving my all to God was the best thing I could have ever done. Now the person who once chased sex on a daily basis is proud to say I AM CELIBATE. By the power of the Holy Spirit I am beating my flesh. I still have desires and improper thoughts, but I am victorious over this.
It’s is a very odd thing to hear a man say he’s celibate. I mean we’re never taught to not have sex as men. Women are taught to wait until marriage but a man not having sex is shunned by his peers. I caught my old way of thinking emerging once planning workshops for my youth in my mentor program. I was going to have a class on celibacy for the girls and thought to myself “I cant teach the young guys this.” Why not? This is what God requires of us. It is time that we as men in the body of Christ adhere to what God desires from us. If you love God then it’s cool for a man to celibate. It’s cool for a man to wait until marriage. It’s cool for a man to tell a woman “because of what I believe; we cant do this.” As opposed to it always having to be the woman, while the man is trying to figure out how to break her.
MEN lets be the MEN that God created us to be, and that is NOT a man sleeping around with every woman. I know this is not popular, but it’s necessary. I know it’s not easy, but it’s possible. Who do we want to please more, our flesh or God? CHOOSE GOD!!
By Min. Mitchell Chance